George and Carlos... Gone Fishing...
I had visit from a friend of mine and he wanted me to tell this story of a couple of friends of ours. So said, "Hey! What the Hey! Why not!" So, without further ado, here it is. Enjoy...
George and Carlos... Gone Fishing...
George and Carlos were about as close as two friends can be. George was a medium sized Aquarian, 5' 81/2" tall and 155 pounds with no fat. He wasn't a muscular fellow but he was well built and just a bit good looking.
Carl was a typical Scorpio male, tall and wiry, narrow at the hip and wide at the shoulders with a ruddy complexion and slightly rusty-reddish hair,-and very athletic.
George and Carl worked at the same plywood/paper mill. George was a cracker-jack plywood maker and Carl was a top notch paper maker. On their days off, they were always together doing something.
George worked eight hours a day from eight am to six pm, five days a week. Once in a while he worked overtime, a double shift, but that was the exception, not the rule.
Carl worked a weird rotating shift so that every three cycles he had four consecutive days off. When that happened, they popped a diet pill apiece, loaded up the cool chest with Budweiser Beer, rolled a few joints and headed for a two day sturgeon fishing trip on the Snake River, just upstream from Clarkston, Washington, toward Asotin.
Sounds pretty pleasant, doesn't it; typical days off stuff? Well, it started that way.
The boys had everything packed up and were just about ready to head for the river. Carl usually drove because George always got a bit of a head start on the pills, he being an impatient sort, and was hyper-hyper.
However, this time they both got head starts and, not only was George loaded, but, Carl, also, was soaring.
Carl had a 3/4 ton, 4X4 Ford Pickup which they always drove to the river. George had an Olds 98 he drove. This time they were missing a certain type of bait and needed to go to the next small town to get some.
Rather than drive the pickup all that way, they decided to drive the Oldsmobile since it would be quicker.
If you've ever been high on diet pills, you can understand that things tend to speed up some when you get in a hurry. The hurrier you get, the speed-upper things get. Today would be no exception.
Carl and George got in the Olds 98 and headed for the small town to get the missing sturgeon fishing bait. George had been planning to change the oil in his car for some time and there was five quarts of oil in the trunk.
After they had driven a ways, George, wired to the hilt and ready for anything and everything, decided this would be a great time to change the oil in his car. Carl, also super wired, agreed so they watched for a side road, a dirt one that led away from the highway. They found one right away and turned down it, headed away from the highway and civilization.
When you live in the country and need to change your cars' oil, you find an out of the way place where there is a slight depression over which you can pull your car. There you crawl under the car and drain the oil out into the depression and it flows away from you, the car and the car tires.
When George was loaded, he wasn't the sharpest tack in the box, as you will soon see.
They found the depression and George crawled under the Olds, removed the oil pan plug and watched the oil drain from the car. He noted how neat the oil looked as it rushed into the depression/oil drain place and flowed away to where ever car used -drained oil flows.
He replaced the drain plug and slid out from under the car and proceeded to pour the new oil into the oil spout. When he finished, he checked the dip stick. It was covered with oil, maybe a bit too much but he noted he hadn't changed the oil filter. That would account for the slightly excessive oil on the dip stick. Good job. Now, let's go fishing.
'Oops' He got into the car, started it up and let it run for a few seconds.(It was so quiet-new oil works wonders) He slipped the transmission into drive to pull away and nothing happened. He looked an Carl, "What the heck is wrong?"
At this time, it would be impossible to determine which of the two wonders was the loaded-est. Carl said to try it again. George tried it again. Nothing happened again. Carl got out and opened the hood and checked the oil. He saw it was all right, just a little bit overfilled. He got back in the car and they discussed it briefly. Even if the oil was a bit over, the car should still go.
Carl asked if George could think of any other reason the car wouldn't move. George mentioned that the new oil was a different color but that shouldn't make any difference. Carl asked what color it was. George said amber. Carl asked what color the old oil was. George said purple.
A huge light came on above Carl's head; so bright, it almost blinded both of them. Carl got back out of the car and told George to get out, too. He raised the hood and, once again, checked the oil. The dipstick showed ten quarts. Then he checked the transmission dipstick. This dipstick showed zero transmission fluid.
Carl started walking back down the dirt road, back the way they had come. George asked Carl where he was going and Carl said, "To town to buy some purple transmission fluid."
George and Carl were very late getting to their fishing spot that night. This episode was never mentioned again. I have no idea what story they told their wives as to why it took so long to get the sturgeon bait. But, I know it must have been a dandy.